I've played every comedy club and every theatre across the country for the last 25 years and seen a lot of audience members from different ethnic persuasions.

Lisa Lampanelli

Lisa Lampanelli

Profession: Comedian
Nationality: American

Some suggestions for you :

Nobody escapes during Lisa Lampanelli's show.

I kind of knew inside that I wanted to try comedy, but it was a mystery. How do you start? So when I hit 30 and I had done everything I wanted to do in journalism, so I went to a comedy class. I figured I'd learn how to do five minutes and see how it feels.

By being politically correct, you're closing your mind to a different point of view. Which sounds a lot like prejudice. Which is definitely not politically correct. See what I just did there?

Don't laugh at a hair joke, Trump.

I feel that if I retire today, I've done enough. I've achieved everything in comedy... I feel I don't need anything else. It's already built.

I'm a take-no-prisoners type of comic, and I'm lucky because my fans get me and never have a problem with the politically incorrect themes of my act. But I am continually amazed by how a certain section of our society seems to be so freakin' sensitive about jokes.

What we do as comics can be a service to people. It can make them laugh and take their mind off their problems for a few minutes.

I don't sell myself. I've never explained my comedy to people who don't get it. Never complain. Never explain.

If Flavor Flav was any smaller and darker, Brad and Angelina would try to adopt him.

I don't like any of it. I'm sick and tired of menopause.

If they hate you, they hate you, but I've always been polarizing, and I love that.

I didn't feel ready to leave home, because it went from no freedom to all freedom. And I was like, 'Oh, my God, I don't know what I'm doing in college.' There seemed to be no like-minded people where I was... I didn't have a clan. I didn't have a choir... There was no safety net.

I wasn't ready to be a dog's mother! Trust me, I'm completely unfit and irresponsible. I'm a comic that travels 48 weeks a year, but I make it work, so you can, too.

Crazy diets, good diets, you can't name one I didn't do.