Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

Some suggestions for you :

The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.

Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isnt permanent.

I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?

Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word 'Chippendales', they don't necessary think of chairs.

Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them.

You don't seem to realize that a poor person who is unhappy is in a better position than a rich person who is unhappy. Because the poor person has hope. He thinks money would help.

One of the most difficult things to contend with in a hospital is that assumption on the part of the staff that because you have lost your gall bladder you have also lost your mind.

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.

A man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

I think success has no rules, but you can learn a great deal from failure.

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

The average healthy well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.