Even though a number of people have tried, no one has ever found a way to drink for a living.

Some suggestions for you :

I make mistakes; I'll be the second to admit it.

Women speak because they wish to speak, whereas a man speaks only when driven to speak by something outside himself like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

I think success has no rules, but you can learn a great deal from failure.

Some people have such a talent for making the best of a bad situation that they go around creating bad situations so they can make the best of them.

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck-if you survive you start looking very carefully to the right and left.

A man speaks only when driven to speech by something outside himself - like, for instance, he can't find any clean socks.

The average healthy well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word 'Chippendales', they don't necessary think of chairs.

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isnt permanent.

The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.

The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.

You don't seem to realize that a poor person who is unhappy is in a better position than a rich person who is unhappy. Because the poor person has hope. He thinks money would help.

Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?