In our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either.

Some suggestions for you :

I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.

That's just the way: a person does a low-down thing, and then he don't want to take no consequences of it. Thinks as long as he can hide it, it ain't no disgrace.

It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.

He was a good enough sort of cretur, and hadn't no harm in him, and was just a genius, as the papers said, which wasn't his fault.

One must travel, to learn. Every day, now, old Scriptural phrases that never possessed any significance for me before, take to themselves a meaning.

Any established church is an established crime, an established slave pen.

Do not bring your dog.

A home without a cat — and a well-fed, well-petted and properly revered cat — may be a perfect home, perhaps, but how can it prove title?

Make it a point to do something every day that you don't want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.

It is said, in this country, that if a man can arrange his religion so that it perfectly satisfies his conscience, it is not incumbent upon him to care whether the arrangement is satisfactory to anyone else or not.

Man will do MANY things to get himself loved. Man will do ALL things to get himself envied.

In discarding the monkey and substituting man, our Father in Heaven did the monkey an undeserved injustice.

His head was an hour-glass; it could stow an idea, but it had to do it a grain at a time, not the whole idea at once.

There are two kinds of speakers. Those who are nervous and those who are liars.