Yesterday, my eyeglass prescription ran out.
When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?"
I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?
I just lost a buttonhole.
I'm a psychic amnesiac. I know in advance what I'll forget.