Age is not a particularly interesting .. Groucho Marx

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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

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Groucho Marx

Profession: Comedian
Nationality: American

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Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you're probably watching the wrong channel.

Anything that can't be done in bed isn't worth doing at all.

Clear? Huh! Why a four-year-old child could understand this report! Run out and find me a four-year-old child, I can't make head or tail of it.

I do not want to belong to any club that would accept me as a member.

Bel Air, I am convinced, was laid out by some diabolic sadist who deliberately decided not to use a compass or a surveyor.

He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot.

Do you mind if I don't smoke?

If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.

The first thing which I can record concerning myself is, that I was born. These are wonderful words. This life, to which neither time nor eternity can bring diminution - this everlasting living soul, began. My mind loses itself in these depths.

I have nothing but respect for you - and not much of that.

If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

Either he's dead or my watch has stopped.

I must say I find television very educational. The minute somebody turns it on, I go to the library and read a good book.

Why, look at me. I've worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

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