If a man makes me keep my distance, the comfort is, he keeps his at the same time.

Jonathan Swift

Jonathan Swift

Profession: Author
Nationality: Irish

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For these reasons, the trade of a soldier is held the most honorable of all others, because a soldier is a Yahoo hired to kill, in cold blood, as many of his own species, who have never offended him, as possibly he can.

But a Broom-stick, perhaps you will say, is an Emblem of a Tree standing on its Head; and pray what is Man but a topsy-turvy Creature? His Animal Faculties perpetually mounted on his Rational; his Head where his Heels should be, groveling on the Earth.

A wise person should have money in their head, but not in their heart.

I should perhaps like others have astonished you with strange improbable tales; but I rather chose to relate plain matter of fact in the simplest manner and style; because my principal design was to inform you, and not to amuse you.

Books, the children of the brain.

I row after health like a waterman...

Words are but wind; and learning is nothing but words; ergo, learning is nothing but wind.

It is observed, that the red haired of both sexes are more libidinous and mischievous than the rest, whom yet they much exceed in strength and activity.

What they do in heaven we are ignorant of; what they do not do we are told expressly.

Readers may be divided into three classes - the superficial, the ignorant, and the learned, and I have with much felicity fitted my pen to the genius and advantage of each.

His features are strong and masculine, with an Austrian lip and arched nose, his complexion olive, his countenance erect, his body and limbs well proportioned, all his motions graceful, and his deportment majestic.

When the world has once begun to use us ill, it afterwards continues the same treatment with less scruple or ceremony, as men do to a whore.

If Heaven had looked upon riches to be a valuable thing, it would not have given them to such a scoundrel.

Vision is the art of seeing what is invisible to others.