Some suggestions for you :
When a man marries again, it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs.
There are more old drunks than there are old doctors.
Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters heaven! Thus, let us drink beer!
A majority of young people seem to develop mental arteriosclerosis forty years before they get the physical kind. Another question: why do some people remain open and elastic into extreme old age, whereas others become rigid and unproductive before they're fifty?
The problem with Marxism is the proletariat isn't going to rise up against capitalism. The only time they'll rise up is during a commercial break to either go to the bathroom a grab more beer.
I went out with a guy who once told me I didn't need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, I'm drinking so that you're more fun to be around.
When I was young, people lived from paycheck to paycheck. Today, it seems like they live from credit card payment to credit card payment.
Life is an act of faith.
Irony is the gaiety of reflection and the joy of wisdom.
Family and friends and faith are the most important things in your life.
You can kill the dreamer, but you can't kill the dream.
When prosperity comes, do not use all of it.
A mental stain can neither be blotted out by the passage of time nor washed away by any waters.
Ah, beer. The cause of and the solution to all of life's problems.