The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague.

Some suggestions for you :

Nothing separates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passions for procrastination and weird clothes.

I cannot understand how the education of this United States of America has been fooled time and time again. Either make it separate but equal or integrate, therefore it will be equal. And it has been separate and unequal.

I am certainly not an authority on love because there are no authorities on love, just those who've had luck with it and those who haven't.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

I think the part of media that romanticizes criminal behavior, things that a person will say against women, profanity, being gangster, having multiple children with multiple men and women and not wanting to is prevalent. When you look at the majority of shows on television they placate that kind of behavior.

The Internet is like Hitler they think they are getting rid of the problem but they're not.

Any man today who returns from work, sinks into a chair, and calls for his pipe is a man with an appetite for danger.

I'm supposed to figure out if the glass is half full or half empty, I told her.

A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.

The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.

In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to disciplne a child is still a mystery to most fathers and...mothers Only your grandmother and Genghis Khan know how to do it.

A word to the wise ain't necessary, it's the stupid ones who need advice.

The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.