One of my major goals off the field is to conduct myself in a way that... parents are proud to say, 'Oh yeah, look, he wants to be like Sonny Bill Williams.'
Beforehand you think, 'Oh, changing nappies - I'm going to be up; I need to get sleep for training.' But when it happens, when you're there, as soon as you hear a wiggle or a cough or something, you're up straight away. It doesn't bother you.
I grew up in a commissioned house in the next suburb over, Mount Abbot. It was a two-bedroom house with me, my brother, and my two sisters. Mum and Dad slept in the lounge, and we didn't have wallpaper.
What's the worst that can happen? I get knocked out. At least I tried.
Every rugby player in Australia and New Zealand or wherever they are from wants to play in the World Cup, and I am no different.
If we're going to be getting treated like that, why can't we treat the clubs like that? I just want to see the game and the players looked after the way they should be because the crowds don't turn up to watch David Gallop play... they turn up to watch the players play.
Every time you step out on that field, it's tough. There is no easy way to approach it and no short cuts out there.
I thought that if I could play rugby on TV, I'd be able to get my mum a house. That was the driving factor.
When I first went to rugby, I wanted it all; I just wanted it all, and you know, I thought it was just going to happen just like that, but I've come to learn that good things take time.
Going back in time, the best sportsmen ever have been Olympians.
We're so lucky where we live, but we're so out of touch. Everyone's mindset is made to feel that refugees are a problem, but it's more than that. They're human beings, too. They were forced from their homes.
Being a young Kiwi lad, a young Polynesian boy, I was pretty close to my family. But when I moved to Sydney, I went from training twice a week, playing touch footy with my mates, to working full-time as a labourer and training professionally.
One thing I've learned over my career is that simplicity is the key: on the field, off as well.
I guess you could say I have grown up, matured. I have seen a lot, and I guess that probably sums it up.
I would say I have become a lot smarter in the way I understand things.
My mindset at this stage, especially after having a daughter... it's just changed my whole outlook.
I didn't feel that I really fit in anywhere. So when I was young I always had to prove myself through my sporting ability.
After that first month in Sydney, I went home for two weeks. I didn't want to ever go back because it was so hard.
I'm not going to sit here and be stupid. If someone comes and offers me double what I'm on, of course I'm going to sit down and seriously look at it.
Sometimes they are big hurdles, but good players can overcome them. I am trying to do my best.
If I could go back and change how I left the NRL, I would. My name will forever be tarnished but I wasn't the man I am now.
I had to work on the fundamentals of the game because in league, the position I played, it was just bash and crash.
The NRL is not an easy gig, but they have some good talent, some good youngsters coming through.
I think the reason I hadn't fought was just the aftermath of the Botha fight. You put so much into a fight, and people just talk about it like it was a bit of a farce or something.
To be part of something special, to be an Olympian and have the chance to win a medal - it's an amazing feeling.
Now, I know a lot of things in the big man's world are not what they seem: a lot of people are out for themselves, and you can't always trust what someone says.
I guess I've always had a - not really thought of myself as this big star, big identity in the game.
I grew up as a Polynesian kid in the Polynesian community, and I was this skinny white kid.
I've got to do everything extra to put myself in the best shape to get in the World Cup squad.
I think I'm evolving, I'm always in search of bettering myself, how I can improve as a sportsman and as a person.
That's the beautiful thing about being a father for the first time; it has really made me get my concentration levels in check.
My biggest challenge for myself is to be the best father I can be and be the best husband I can be.
I don't need a pool room with medals and everything hanging up.
It doesn't matter what you look like. Experience is the key.
I'll be seeking professional help with regards to alcohol and, until myself and the club feel this is under control, I'll be off the drink.
To win competitions you need a bit of luck and some talent. I think we have some talent on our bus.
As a rugby player, you strive to be an All Black, win a World Cup, and win a Super Rugby title.
I rock up to training, and Folkesy, Steve Folkes - someone that, to be honest, has never paid any interest in my personal life - he comes up to me and starts saying, 'You're not turning Muslim are you?'
You always feel for your fellow players when they are going through tough times, losing and things like that.
As a league player, for myself, you strive to win a comp. I'm lucky enough to have achieved that... but most sportspeople would love to go to the Olympics, and I haven't achieved that.
I do speak my mind a lot more than when I was younger. I guess that's just my Polynesian background. That's how we are: just sit back and try and fit in, try and make everyone else happy.