If you're billed as a comedian, people will accept anything you say as light-hearted and not with intent behind it.
When you think about it, we actors are kind of prostitutes. We get paid to feign attraction and love. Other people are paying to watch us kissing someone, touching someone, doing things people in a normal monogamous relationship would never do with anyone who's not their partner. It's really kind of gross.
I try to live with the idea that karma is a very real thing. So I put out what I want to get back.
I don't read my own press, so I don't know what's being reported on a daily basis - I only hear about things when they reach a sort of Def-Con status, and my publicist calls me because we have to do some damage control.
I think once you enter the dating world and you realise it's nothing like those Disney movies you watched when you were a little girl, you just become more guarded.
When I talk about my husband, I feel as if people roll their eyes. It's like when you're 16 and order a martini, and the waiter says, 'Do you think I'm stupid?'. They can't grasp that I'm old enough to be married.
I'm horrible to live with. I don't clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet.
I have to really enjoy someone's personality, not just their looks, before I'll kiss them.
Sometimes I say things that I think are obviously sarcastic and people take them quite literally.
In New York, especially, so much of your life is spent on the streets. You don't always want to be driving around in an SUV with a security guard. You want to be able to walk to a restaurant; you want to go and do things.
And you know, the people who hate kids and don't want kids always end up having 50 of them.
I booked 'Transformers' having no clue what I was doing. And then, all of a sudden, it was like: 'You've got to get your game together fast.' It sucks, but I'm trying.
People compare me to Angelina Jolie, and she's so serious and stoic. I'm the opposite.
I've had rough first trimesters. But once you get into the second, it's fine after that.
I don't really resent being on the red carpet as much as I do having to deal with the paparazzi.
I hate going out and being in crowds or being in clubs. I can't deal with it, and I don't like it; I've never liked it.
I could go days, weeks, without talking to another human being.
I hate receiving compliments; I hate being told I'm talented or people think I'm going to be a movie star. I always feel that it's forced and fake.
I'm just really confident sexually, and I think that sort of oozes out of my pores. It's just there. It's something I don't have to turn on.
No one believes me when I talk about this, but I'm really, really maternal.
I never call them 'guys;' I always call them 'boys.' Maybe it's a superiority complex - my needing to keep them down.
I have no problem with commitment - you can't have a real relationship without it. I can flip on a switch in my brain, and even if the next Brad Pitt is standing next to me, I won't look at him. But I can also turn that switch off, and then I collect attractive boys.
To be outspoken, or different at all, is a problem for women.
If I get stuck doing comic-book films for the rest of my life, I'll be really happy.
I need to hold onto my soul and my integrity, and I can't compromise that.
I could see myself in a relationship with a girl; Olivia Wilde is so sexy she makes me want to strangle a mountain ox with my bare hands. She's mesmerizing.
I'm not a lesbian. I just think that all humans are born with the ability to be attracted to both sexes.
I always want to be a part of ensembles. Besides it feeling safer, I think it's a more fun environment to work in. To have a bunch of people collaborating on something, it takes the pressure off of each individual.
Try and stay away from dairy - especially if you're a woman! It's really hard on your hormones.
Ninety-eight percent of the things that come out of my mouth are intended to be harmless or even charming. They're not ever intended to be offensive or controversial.
If I really buckle down, I think one day I could be a very good actress.
People who don't like me talk about it as though I'm trash because I have tattoos. I find that insane because it's 2008, not the 1950s. Tattoos aren't limited to sailors. It's a form of art I find beautiful. I love it.
I loved 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.' It was such a big part of my childhood.
My biggest regret is that I've assisted the media in making me into a cartoon character. I don't regret what has happened to me, but I regret the way I have dealt with it.