But I don't begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it's just to put a roof over your head and food on the table.

I'm into 'House of Cards.' 'Breaking Bad' - my God, did I binge on that!

When I went to New York to try and make it, I never thought it wouldn't happen.

Jimmy Stewart and Lucille Ball were so unique.

I really enjoy connecting with the audience.

My grandmother and I followed my mother here, to a house a block north of Hollywood Boulevard but a million miles away from Hollywood, if you know what I mean. We would hang out behind the ropes and look at the movie stars arriving at the premieres.

I was raised going to the movies with my grandmother as a kid. And then I'd come home, and my best friend and I would act out the films that we saw.

I never felt cynical, and I never felt that I couldn't do what I wanted to do.

I liked myself better when I wasn't me.

I had it in my contract with CBS, a very weird clause that was never written before and certainly not since, that if I wanted to do a variety show within the first five years of the contract, CBS would have to put it on for 30 shows.

When I left 'The Garry Moore Show,' I signed a 10-year contract with CBS.

When things are a disappointment, try not to be so discouraged.

Words once they are printed have a life of their own.

It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.

I am not a person who yells at all, but I realized that I have always felt so good after doing the Tarzan yell, after doing Charo, or screaming as Eunice.

I'm glad I was born when I was. My time was the golden age of variety. If I were starting out again now, maybe things would happen for me, but it certainly would not be on a variety show with 28 musicians, 12 dancers, two major guest stars, 50 costumes a week by Bob Mackie. The networks just wouldn't spend the money today.

You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself.

I don't eat much meat, fish, or poultry.

My grandmother and I saw an average of eight movies a week, double features, second run.

I had a good loud voice and I wasn't afraid to be goofy or zany.

I don't watch sitcoms. I really don't. My problem with them is they take so long to film them that there's no spontaneity. I want to see that.

Well, I don't know how astute I am, but I did want to be a journalist when I was growing up.

Because nobody goes through life without a scar.

I loved the Kennedy Center Honors because you just sit there, smile, wave, and cry.

I wanted to be on Broadway, but in musical comedy.

I loved doing 'The Family' with Eunice and Mama. They were very interesting because there were no jokes written into those sketches. It was all character-driven. And sometimes it got a little heavy.

My childhood was rough, we were poor and my parents were alcoholics, but nobody was mean. I knew I was loved. We were on welfare, but I never felt abandoned or unloved.

I love Maya Rudolph. She's very multitalented herself.

I was very entertained by Betty Grable and Judy Garland.

I think the hardest thing to do in the world, show-business-wise, is write comedy.

When I was in college at UCLA, I took a playwriting course. I was all set to be a writer. But I had to take this acting class as a theater arts major. I had to do this scene in a one-act comedy. I just said this line, and then... this laugh happened. I thought, 'Whoa. This is a really good feeling. What have I been missing?'

It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad that we don't have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team's lawyers.

We don't stop going to school when we graduate.

In '57, I got a job at the Blue Angel nightclub, and a gentleman named Ken Welch wrote all my material for me. I lived at a place called the Rehearsal Club that was actually the basis for a play called Stage Door.

I think the reason I was successful is that I was never cynical.

I come from Texas, and my grandmother and mother were born in Arkansas.

Comedy is tragedy plus time.

My first book was an open letter to my three daughters.

I was in California, and I was going to UCLA, and I knew I certainly didn't have movie star looks. I remember seeing pictures and photos of Ethel Merman and Mary Martin, who were kind of average looking. I said, 'Well, that's for me, then, to go back to New York and try to be in musical comedy on Broadway.'

I am not a joke-teller. Stand-up, I couldn't do.

I didn't really get comfortable until I got to UCLA, and I had to take an acting course because I was studying theater arts.

Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don't like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.

Steve Martin in 'All of Me,' when he did that whole thing where he was possessed by the spirit in his body? It was brilliant.

You have to really want it, and don't take it personally if you don't get a job. Because sometimes you're not the type. And sometimes it's somebody else's turn.

If I go to a party, I'm not one to be the funniest person in the room at all.

I do the 'New York Times' crossword puzzle every morning to keep the old grey matter ticking.

I'm really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.

I struggled for a while, but when I was cast in an Off Broadway show called 'Once Upon a Mattress,' that kind of put me on the map.

Funny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter.